This ref from the NFC Championship Game is not down with being in the middle of a celebratory high five. Either that or Jason Avant has some really stinky pits. It’s a good thing Celek and Avant didn’t go for the chest bump.
Gerald Wallace Has Flubber in His Shoes
Gotta love the fan with the video camera at floor level, just in case some shit like that happens. I guess when you’re a Bobcats fan, there’s really no other reason to pay for those tickets anyway.
And yes, Greg Oden has been added to TSOL.
Filed under Feats of Tremendous Athleticism
Nuggets of Greatness: January 15
Nuggets of Greatness is our semi-regular link dump. We search through all the crap on the internet to unearth the best posts of the day. I am out of thinly veiled poop references. Shit.
- Giving all new meaning to the phrase “I’d love to be in a foursome with Jessica Biel” (Epic Carnival)
- Rickey Henderson and Jim Rice plugged Madonna [scroll down] (SPORTSbyBROOKS)
- Rajon Rondo: Son of Plastic Man (Sports Hernia)
- Ricky Hatton thinks Christiano Ronaldo is a “fairy”; world nods in agreement (Josh Q Public)
Filed under Nuggets of Greatness
Kobe’s Premature Emasculation
The Lakers and the Spurs played an epic contest last night. With 12 seconds to go, Kobe Bryant drilled a three right in the eye of Roger Mason, giving L.A. a 111-109 advantage. Kobe followed this feat with the greatest dance known to mankind: the Sam Cassell Big Balls Dance.
There was only one problem: you have to back up your claim to enormous testicles. Mason followed Kobe’s bucket with a ridiculous three-point play, giving the Spurs a one-point lead with ten seconds to go.
Kobe’s response? Instead of doing the manly thing, and drilling another shot to show his pair reigned supreme, he passed off to Trevor Ariza. Who travelled. Game, blouses.
The Sam Cassell Dance is a sacred one. Don’t go infuriating the basketball gods, Kobe. Keep an eye out next time you play Reggie Evans.
Also: two new additions to The S#!t On List. Hit the link at the top of the page.
Filed under General
Nuggets of Greatness: January 14
Nuggets of Greatness is our semi-regular link dump. We search through all the crap on the internet to unearth the best posts of the day. I am out of thinly veiled poop references. Shit.
- It’s really goddamn cold outside (MSNBC)
- GOALIE FIGHT! GOALIE FIGHT! JUST CLICK ON IT ALREADY (The Fanhouse)
- Father gives 14-year-old son steroids. Son hits mother. Father arrested. I think I saw this one on Leave It To Beaver (Deadspin)
- “Martial Arts Tricking” aka people who will unexpectedly turn a bar fight into Drunken Master III (With Leather)
Filed under Nuggets of Greatness
A Contrast in Dunkability
Thud.
We’ve got two new additions to The S#!t On List, both coming from last night’s Grizzlies/Cavs tilt. I’m not even going to bother looking up the final score, because that’s not what we care about over here. To the video!
First, an example of spectacular athleticism being used for good (or evil, if you’re Delonte West):
Hakim Warrick has hops. I’d recommend getting out the way next time.
On the other hand, we have a man who has been in the news a fair amount lately: Darius Miles. Despite dropping 13 points last night in his Grizzlies debut (and playing in his 10th game of the season, significantly affecting Portland’s cap space next offseason), Miles will be ridiculed here for being the second man to make TSOL for violating The Von Wafer Corollary:
Yikes. Negative points for the egregious travel and the mid-air Jordan leg kick. Maybe the Blazers had a point after all.
Ummmm… Rachel Nichols?
Look at those eyes...
Erin Andrews vs. Rachel Nichols is the first in an ongoing series of Master Debates, in which Overdramatica and Mr. Snappy go head-to-head in a battle of wits and wisdom. After each of us present our argument, we’ll throw up a poll, and let the people decide who wins. God Bless America.
Helllloooo Ms. Nichols!
It’s about time this ongoing debate between OD and I is finally put to rest. To be perfectly honest, I’m upset I even have to explain myself. It is obvious to me that Nichols’ is the hotter of the two. Nevertheless, OD makes some valid points. Here is my rebuttal…
First, we need to better define what we are going for here. Are we saying purely physical attractiveness? If so, Nichols wins, albeit by a smaller margin than if we go by my preferred criteria: most bonable.
The thing is, Andrews is a pretty lady. Conventionally attractive, conservative, and simple. She has a lovely smile, and an unoffensive demeanor. She is the type of girl you have a crush on in middle school, but out grow it when you realize she’s just, well… boring.
Nichols, on the other hand, strikes me as a rampaging sex panther. A quick disclaimer: I don’t know Rachel Nichols personally. Every assumption I make herein is based on her on-screen performance.
And oh what a performance it is. The way Nichols stares you down as she talks about Tom Brady (which is arousing in its own right 
), never relenting with those big, brown eyes, tells me she’s the type who’ll stare into your eyes at other times, too. Her no nonsense attitude, and the way she signs off with a perfectly punctuated E-S-P-N, and a slight shake of the head, tell me this is a woman who knows what she wants, and knows how to get it. Oh, and the red hair? Hot. These are the things that convince me she could do things that would make any man’s knees weak.
However, if we must reduce ourselves to a point-by-point comparison, so be it.
-Andrews was a dancer? That’s cool. Too bad it doesn’t mean anything. The prudest girl I ever met was a dancer. Just because Nichols went to one of the best journalism schools in the country to be… a journalist, shouldn’t count against her here.
-Gators vs. Wildcats. STDs vs. PhDs. Besides, a nasty little girl like Rachel Nichols was probably totally repressed at Northwestern. She’s dying to kick it with someone who doesn’t wear sweater-vests over sweaters.
-Are we really bringing the other Rachel Nichols into this? She’s hotter than either of them…
-As for actual possiblity of bonage? Erin Andrews might be single, but she doesn’t let anyone passed first base. Rachel Nichols can’t remember the names of half the guys she’s dominated. And if Rachel Nichols is cheating with Coolio, Erin Andrews is cheating with Tom Brady. I’ll take my chances with Coolio.
-Are you actually trying to use the argument that Erin Andrews is the type of girl who’d watch sports with you, but Rachel Nichols isn’t? Ummm… they are both sports reporters, remember?
-Nice picture of Andrews using her laptop.
Is this not the most normal chick you’ve ever seen? Not to mention her boobs are about half way down her torso. Rachel Nichols has a tight little body.
-Rachel Nichols is 36. That is supposed to be a bad thing? Look at her! Cougar.
-Oh, and if Wikipedia is relevant in this discussion, then so is “Rachel Nichols’” Myspace page, which clearly states she is single.
Basically, it comes down to this. Erin Andrews might flirt with you a little bit, and then go to bed early (and alone). Rachel Nichols will pull you into a storage closet and change your life.
End of discussion.
UPDATE: The poll is up.
Filed under Master Debates
Nuggets of Greatness: January 13
Nuggets of Greatness is our semi-regular link dump. We search through all the crap on the internet to unearth the best posts of the day. I am out of thinly veiled poop references. Shit.
- The tale of a girl who left a true nugget of greatness outside Dolphins Stadium before the national title game (EDSBS)
- EDSBS continues its tremendous day by unearthing footage of a Florida fan’s unique way of celebrating (EDSBS, again)
- Myron Rolle is a greater man than you, me, and even Tim Tebow (Deadspin)
- Antonio Cromartie, a personal favorite of Homer Eroticism (boy, that sounds gay) played the whole season with an injury your grandmother can sympathize with (Shutdown Corner)
Filed under Nuggets of Greatness
Erin Andrews vs. Rachel Nichols: Duh
Erin Andrews vs. Rachel Nichols is the first in an ongoing series of Master Debates, in which Overdramatica and Mr. Snappy go head-to-head in a battle of wits and wisdom. After each of us presents our argument, we’ll throw up a poll, and let the people decide who wins. God Bless America.
I distinctly remember not being able to speak when I first heard Mr. Snappy profess that he would rather have carnal relations with ESPN’s Rachel Nichols than America’s Sexiest Sportscaster (according to Playboy [link SFW, believe it or not]) Erin Andrews. There are some arguments in which there is no right or wrong answer. This is not one of those arguments. Honestly, I could just put up a picture of each of them and declare this thing over:
There. I Win.
However, that wouldn’t be very fun. I’m going to take this argument beyond the blatant, optically-pleasing obvious.
- While an undergrad at the University of Florida, Andrews was a Dazzler. That’s right, she was on the fucking dance team. Can I get an hallelujah for flexibility? HALLELUJAH!
- Speaking of colleges, Andrews was a Gator. Nichols? A Northwestern Wildcat. As a current student at a school in the Great White North, I can tell you, without hesitation, that Andrews partied harder. Massive state school in the South > Small, dorky northern private school.
- Rachel Nichols is not even the hottest famous person named Rachel Nichols.
Infinitely more boneable than Rachel Nichols, ESPN version.
- While rumors have been thrown around about Andrews having flings with various athletes, she is single. Nichols, however, is married. And has been since 2001. I don’t care how many “flings” Andrews has had, there’s no way she’s more used up than Nichols, who also is five years Erin’s senior.
- Nichols’ husband is an exec at Tommy Boy Entertainment, a prominent music label. Sorry fellas, but if she’s trying to cheat, she’s banging Coolio. Have fun following that one up.
- Andrews spent part of her early career covering the Tampa Bay Lightning for the Sunshine Network. There is nothing sexier than a girl who will grab a beer with you and watch some hockey. Actually hearing intelligent input while watching Canada’s Finest Contribution to Earth is cause for a raging hard-on that only subsides after looking at … Rachel Nichols (bam!).
- I’m a Mac guy.
- Erin clearly has no problem with younger men.
- Wikipedia knows all. When Wikipedia doesn’t have your picture posted, it probably means you look like a horse.
- Finally, one word: firecrotch.
Snappy’s retort is coming soon, but don’t hold your breath. I already know who wins this one.
– Overdramatica
UPDATE: The poll is up. Do the right thing, America.
Filed under Master Debates
